It was green. It was yellow. And scaly. And had beady eyes. And when Meg saw it in the drawer she said:
"AaaaaaaaaAaaaaaaaaaaaAaaaaaaaaa!" (That's a direct quote).
Bev came running into the room.
"What?"
Meg pointed into the drawer.
"Ah!" Bev screamed when the reptile crawled out.
Rachel came into the room.
"Kill it!" Bev ordered, getting on the bed as it scuttled across the floor.
All three girls screamed, "AAAAAAaaaaaaaAAaAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaa."
Rachel got a shoe and threw it.
"It went to the corner!" Bev waved in that direction.
The girls used any amnunition they could get their hands on. Combs, books, hairbrushes, Meg's compact; the mirror broke... seven years bad luck.
"Don't kill it!" an out-of breath panicked voice came from the doorway. It was Prince Harry.
Faith and Kerry walked around him. "What's going on?"
The lizard scuttled towards the boy; up his leg, around his body and and rested on his shoulder. It stuck its forked tongue out at the girls in a hiss.
"Bo-bo, did they hurt you?" he stroked the reptile's head. "Did those mean girls hurt you?" He glared at them.
Bev panted. "You own that lizard?"
Harry stuck his nose up in the air. "He's an iguana!" he corrected haughtily before exiting the room in a huff.
The girls looked at each other.
"Brad," Bev said his name, getting down from the bed. "He's behind this. And his little stooges."
"You have no proof that they did it," Meg defended.
"How's this for proof?" Kerry waved the girls over to the drawer.
There was a note.

WE WERE HERE

the boys of Eton

Faith murmured. "Fee fi fo fum. I smell the blood of five Etonians."
Bev too the note out of Kerry's hands.
The girls huddled around her.
"This is what we're going to do..."

"No!!!!!" Brad's agony could be heard through the dorm.
William walked in and saw his friend strecthed out on his bed. His right arm covering his eyes in a dramatic gesture. His other, outstretched and holding a note.

Guess who has Miss January hostage?

the girls of Eton

William's eyes met with Brad's.
"I already checked," Brad sighed.
William looked in the secret compartment in the closet. "They took our stash of porno mags?" William clutched his heart in disbelief.
Brad buried his face in his hands. "From January to December."
"Aurgh!"
"I told you! I told you not to mess with the girls. But did you listen to me? No! No! No one listens to the brains of the group. You'd all rather listen to Mr. Brawn here." Kevin pointed accusingly to Brad.
"We gotta get back at them," Brad told the group.
"What?!"the rest asked him.
"Not this week," Brad said. "Next. At the homecoming party."

Chapter Seven
They were having a test.
The room was quiet as the boys and Faith huddled in their chairs. Only the sound of pens scratching over paper could be heard.
Faith answered the questions not really caring if she got the correct answer or not. Isn't there a law about sending kids to school when they don't want to? She thought about her father and wished he would call again. And she knew exactly what she wanted him to say "Faith, I'm taking you out of Eton." Oh, how she hoped. She sniffed. Did she want it so much that she was going to cry? She felt as if she were having a runny nose. She sniffed again.
William was looking at his paper pretty sure he got most of the answers right. He was a genius afterall. A sound from Faith caused him to look in her direction.
Stop calling me that! She wanted to yell, but didn't. Drops of red fell on her test paper. She lifted her fingers to her nose. Blood.
"Miss America, are you all right?" William said.
"I'm fine," she snapped, trying to stop the blood flow.
The teacher looked in their direction.
Taking action, William took out his white handkercheif.
"I don't need--" Faith declined the offer.
William was adamant and pressed the cloth against her nose. He tilted her head back. "Stay still," he told her. "I'll be right back."
"Your Highness, what is the matter?" the teacher asked, slight irritation in his voice.
"Miss Kerrigan has a nose bleed. I'm going to take her to the clinic."
"Your test?"
William handed it in.
Faith could hear the murmurings of an argument as she held the kercief over her clogged nose. William took her hand. "Come with me."
Faith obeyed wondering why. She never did before.
William handed in her test on their way out.
"Keep your head up," he advised.
William was acting nice again. Why couldn't he just be plain mean so she could hate him instead of keeping her undecided?
When they got their tests back. "Didn't get the grade you wanted, Miss America?"
Bri looked at her hardly earned C.
"Must be hard getting an F," William mocked sympathized.
"And what did you get?"
He showed her his paper which only had two mistakes. He waited for her to praise him.
Faith looked at his two mistakes. "I could've gotten those two right." She looked over the test. "I could've gotten all of these correct. If I wanted to," she informed.
William raised his eyebrows. "Great. Next test you can show me how you do that."
The next test William and her got perfect scores. The only two in the class.
William smiled and suggested dinner together one night for their shared victory.
Faith declined and promised herself it would never happen again.

"You girls are so much trouble," a boy who who Kerry didn't even know stopped her in the hall.
Kerry tried to brace herself. you'd think after a few weeks they boys would act nicer. "Do you know that when you stick your nose up all the way like that I can see down the tunnel of your nostril and... you have no brain!" She walked off.
Kevin who watched from afar smiled at this and walked into the classroom.
"Ugh!" Kerry groaned, sitting beside him.
Kevin began to speak.
Kerry stopped him, "Don't! I can't stand any conversation from a male right now."
Kevin decided wisely to shut up.
The teacher came into the room.
"I'm in love," Kerry whispered to her friends at study hall.
"Who with?" Bev immediately wanted the 411.
The girls still pretended they were readinmg what was in their textbooks. They weren't of course. This was far more interesting.
"He's an Etonian," Kerry said.
"Well, duh," Meg laughed.
The boys who were sitting in another tried to act casual as they listened in.
"Tell us more," Faith urged.
"He's gorgeous." Kerry thought of his amber-colored eyes.
All boys nodded. I'm gorgeous, they all thought. I'm gorgeous. It's me she's talking about.
"He's intelligent." She thought of how great he sounded when he talked.
Hmmm... some boys frowned.
I'm smart, most of them thought. I'm smart. She's talking about me.
"He has a great sense of humor. Confidence. People pay attention to him."
Yeah. yeah. yeah. the egos of the room sky-rocketed.
Kevin looked at his astronomy book. In his heart he prayed: please let her be talking about me. I'm the geek of the school. Why would she be talking about me? Please, let her be talking about me.
"His name is Mr. Parker."
"THE TEACHER!" Brad yelled what everyone was thinking.
The room stared at thier table.
Brad looked at Kev to imply that he was the one who said it.
Kev blushed underneath his glasses. Kerry looked his way and he smiled. She looked away. His heart broke a little.
Ricahrd leaned close to Kev, "Maybe you should tell him he's your half-brother."
William spoke up, "Maybe someone should tell her about his wife and six kids!" Which was true.
Brad looked at Kerry who was still swooning away to Bev and the others. "Nah, she'll find out soon enough."

Three freshmen entered the girls room carrying Megan's books.
"Just put it over there on the desk," Meg instructed them. She smiled at them, "Thank you so very much."
"Bye Megan."
"Bye Megan." one looked at her adoringly.
"Bye Megan." one sighed her name.
They closed the door behind them.
Bev gaped from her bed. She pointed. "How did you do that?"
"What? Oh, that? I just promised them I'd dance with them at the party next week. These guys are desperate."

"They're staring..." Meg murmured as the girls took their seats in the bleachers to witness Eton's first soccer game.
"We should be used to it by now," Bev sighed, sitting down.
On the opposite end of the field the guys from the other school winked and nudged each other, pointing at them.
"Ugh!" Meg shook her head.
Kerry placed her chin in her hands and rested her elbows on her lap. Classes were cancelled that day for the game so she wasn't able to see Mr. Parker. "Why are we here?"
"To cheer Rachel on." Meg reminded.
"She's on the bench," Faith voiced this unfairness. "Don't think she'll be playing much. And like heck am I going to cheer for the guys."
Mike looked back from his spot on the bench and smiled at the girls.
Meg wondered if he was smiling at Faith.
"Photographers," Faith murmured, able to spot them before anyone else. William, she thought and rolled her eyes.
Rachel sat on the bench, more then peeved.
The captain of the other team was chatting her up from his bench. "Oh, look, Eton has a girl on its team." He batted his eyes at her.
Gee, no originality, Rache thought. She chose to ignore him.
"Bet you have fun in the locker room, don't you?" he called out.
His team sniggered.
"Leave her alone," Rich commanded.
The team stopped laughing.
"Why?" the other boy sneered.
"Because I said so, that's why!" Rich told him.
The boy shut up and waited for the game to start.
"You okay?" Harry asked Rachel.
She looked out at the field. "I'd feel better if I was playing."
A whistle blow from the referree.
Harry stood up to take his place with the rest of the team.
"You'll play next game," he assured. He took the ball and ran out.
Rachel hugged her knees to her chest. "Yeah, sure I will."

Eton was losing.
It was then Headmaster Lewis came down the bleachers and made a request to the girls.
"You want us to what???" Bev asked.
He led them to the announcer's booth.
"Cheer the boys on. Give them moral support."
"You mean, act like cheerleaders," Faith said, arms crossed over her chest.
"Yes, Miss Kerrigan. You are correct." He closed the door and locked them in the room.
Meg tapped on the mike. "Does this thing work?"

"Does this thing work?" her voice sounded across the playing field.
The other team scored another goal.
Bad Kev. Wasn't paying attention.

Meg stepped back from it. "I guess it does."
Bev handed the mike to faith. "You do it." She was tempted to call her Miss America but decided against it.
Faith rolled her eyes. "Okay. This is from junior high."

One, two, three four!
Eton boys are ready to score!
Five six seven eight
Eton boys can do just great
Nine! And ten!
Love them love them
Do it again.

Then Eton started winning.
Well, actually the other team was laughing so hard it was easier to get the ball from them.
Rache played with her shoe laces wishing she was on the field.
The speaker crackled and Bev's voice came on."I'd like to revise that cheer."

One two three four
Eton boys can never score
Five six seven eight
Eton boys can't get a date
Nine ten
Hate them hate them
Do it again.

Eveyone on the field stared at the announcers booth.
"Uh, Bev," Kerry told her. "I think the mike is still on."
"It is?" a tone of bewilderment. "Ooops."

"When you girls enrolled here you should've placed on your resumes: accident prone." Brad announced as the ten walked down the halls to the rooms.
"Brad," Bev laughed, when she reached her door. "Did you really think that me making a fool of you over the microphone was an accident?"
Brad stared at her.
Bev smiled.
The door to the girls' room closed.
"I don't want to go to the party tonight." Wills informed.
"We have to." Mike insisted. He survived a swollen bum. He can make it through this.
"Just don't forget our other plans for tonight." Brad said.
The boys nodded.

Chapter Eight
"... Oh, he's so cute..."
"... Oh, he's so sweet..."
"... Oh, he's so funny..."
Bev, Rache, Kerry, Meg and Faith exchanged looks, sipping punch as the girls around them swooned. Bev frowned as she thought back with her friends: I used to be like that?
Well, yes, the agreeed silently, the boys of Eton can be cute, sweet, funny, and all that... Until you go to school with them. When that happens they're just... well, BOYS. Their CLASSMATES. It was weird.
"How do you feel going to school with them?" was the question asked to them all night by astonished females who wanted to know.
The five shrugged. "It's like being in an all girls school. Except it's boys!"
"Brad is such a Babe," a girl none of them knew gushed. "I can't imagine what it would be like to see him everyday."
Bev nodded, she gave her friends a look: Get me out of here!
"What's Richard like?"
Rachel answered, "Other than the fact that he breaks wind to often... He's okay."
"Kevin seems like a quiet guy."
"Kevin's nice," Kerry said.
"Yes Kevin's nice." The girls liked Kevin. (Isn't he a sweetie?)
"Which one of you does Prince William like?"
"Oh, he likes all of us," Faith said sweetly. "Such a player. Flirts a lot. He likes me best."
"No, he likes me," Bev pretended to argue.
"No, he likes me," Meg whined.
Rache stomped her feet.
"I didn't know he liked girls," Kerry murmured, winking.
The girl left them, thinking they were crazy.
The five burst out laughing.
Brad and Co. entered the party. A bit late. Too much time admiring themselves in front of the mirror. They wondered why the girls of St. Mary's were staring at them. True. They've stared before but now... well it was a different stare.
Brad put an arm around Bev's shoulder. He had forgotten what she looked like in something other than her school unisform. She looked good. "What are you gals doing?"
"Ruining your stud reputations," Bev grinned.
Brad didn't doubt her for a second.
The girls tried not to laugh as the guys got shot down on offers to dance.
"What have you been saying about us?" Richard asked. He wondered why a girl was frowning as he drank a glass of milk. It does a body good, right?
"Obviously too much," Kevin informed the group. "From what I hear you're not getting any dates withing the next millinium. Oh, but they like me."
"The power of gossip William," Faith said. "You should know a bit about it."
The girls all smiled at the boys prettily.
Wills looked at Faith and the others leave. He almost didn't feel sorry for what the boys did earlier to thier room

When the girls entered their room it was trashed.

Girls Go Home!

and as if the people writing it were afraid of being rude... One word was added.

Please.

"I'm telling Mr, Lewis." Kerry decided, turning to leave.
"No!" Bev told her forcefully. "No adults get involved in this. I'm not a squealer."
Kerry looked at the state of their room. "They did something wrong and they should pay for it."
"Oh, they'll pay all right," Bev assured. "But we're handing them the bill." She surveyed the room. They could clean it up tonight and it wouldn't look at all different in the morning. Brad hadn't broken anything. Just messed things up. "We fight fire with fire."

In the early morning when the party ended the boys entered Brad and William's room.
It was trashed. The image looked pretty familiar.
Tacked to the wall was a big sign.

We ARE Home

the GIRLS of Eton

*     *     *

"Your insane stunt is going to destroy Eton, John." his peers advised Mr. Lewis around the board room table.
"What are you smiling about?" another one asked.
"Gentlemen," he handed them folders.
"What's this, John?"
"Progress reports of the school in the last two months," the headmaster smiled. "More than fifty-seven percent of the boys grades are up by one point. Competition, lads. They want to impress the girls."
"And the girls?" there was an approving note to the voice.
"They have our Prefects running scared," Mr. Lewis informed somewhat amused. "The four from St. Mary's are the highest in their classes. The one named Kerry could be Valedictorian though Mr. Healey seems to have a solid hold on that position."
One of the men frowned. "How about the American one? Miss Kerrigan."
"She meets our requirements," Mr. Lewis cut it abruptly.
"Well, John," They handed the folders back. "This might not be such a bad idea afterall."
"I'm glad you feel that way because as board of directors I need your approval on something."

(Okay, enough about the boring grown-ups)